Friday, March 21, 2008

I'll Take a D&C for $2,000, Alex!

Alex: You have chosen the category "D&C" for $2,000. Here's your clue: this is the procedure you will be having on Monday at 7am, but for which you must show up at 6am.

[brrrrrrrrrrrrreeeeeeeeeepppp! Mrs. X rings in]

Alex: Mrs. X

Mrs. X: What is my D&C?

Alex [in best Canadian accent]: No. I'm so-rry. The question we were looking for is "What is my second D&C in a row that sucks beyond belief and imagination."

[brrrrrrrrrrreeeeeeeeeeeeppppp! Mrs. X rings in again]

Alex: Yes, Mrs. X?

Mrs. X: I think you looked much better with the mustache. And frankly, I find Will Ferrell's impression of you far more entertaining than you. So-rry.

Alex: That's ok. I liked you better when you hadn't become hardened and embittered by three years of infertility.

Mrs. X: So I guess we're even then?

Alex: Yep.
__________________________________________________________________________________
Thanks to everyone for your beautiful comments. I'm actually doing pretty ok today. I'm sure the grief will come in fits and starts - little things that I have no idea are coming up will trigger it. I already had one such moment this morning when the hospital called to do the usual medical history workup prior to Monday. Once again, I was reminded of all that we have lost. She asked how many pregnancies, including this one, I had had and I answered "two". Any deliveries? No. Ugh, how is it that one question can make you feel so incredibly wretched?

I was really hoping that this would turn into the ultimate phoenix situation, but it wasn't meant to be. Like last time, we are having a karyotype done on the fetus to see what may have gone wrong. Last time, we learned that it was a monosomy - or Turner's syndrome - a 94% fatal chromosomal anomoly. This time, who knows. It may come out completely normal.

There is some good in my world, though. It is a beautiful spring day, my Sweetie and I have the day off, the house is clean since the maid came this morning, I have lots of wonderful friends and family who care enough about me to check up on me and make sure I'm doing ok, I have wonderful friends inside the computer who without even knowing me send their most heartfelt condolences, and I no longer have to worry about when the shoe is going to drop. I'll take what I can get right now.

And, as always, I have Cuteoverload.com:

10 comments:

Melanie said...

No more flowers, unless of course they are the happy ones. No more "D&Cs for $2000, Alex" either. Plenty of Peeps doing pole dances. Lots of Spring sunshine and deli sandwiches (just for a while though). And many, many good thoughts going your way on Monday at the bullshit hour of 6am.

Lori said...

Please, never ever let a surgeon get near your highly-tuned sense of humor.

I'll be thinking of you Monday morning at 6-8 am your time.

Hugs, X.

Pepper said...

Okay, the Peeps pole dance is priceless!

May this be the last time you ever encounter Alex Trebek. Monday will be over soon.

JellyBelly said...

please know that you're in my thoughts. i'm sending you BIG, BIG hugs too. :)

peesticksandstones said...

I'll be thinking of you Monday morning -- hope you're able to get home fast and start healing right away from your "Dusting and Cleaning" (as my 90 year-old Grandma calls is).

By the way, I rely on Cuteoverload just about every day for relief from all of this. And love the Will Ferrel reference. Thanks for making me smile.

Ahuva Batya said...

Your sense of humor will see you through this. You are a very strong person. And the peeps doing a pole dance? Priceless.

shinejil said...

I'll be thinking about you tomorrow morning, my dear Mrs. X.

Mrs.X said...

I hope all of your good thoughts come true - I never want to have to go through one of these things again.

Melanie- thanks for your wonderful thoughts. I already have a nice amount of ham in the fridge!

Lori- Luckily Dr. Uterus likes my sense of humor too, so I don't think he'll do anything to remove it.

Pepper- I too love the peeps on the pole. I'll do my best to avoid Alex.

Jelly - thanks for your hugs.

Mrs.X said...

peesticks- I'm glad I could give you a smile. Darryl Hammond as Sean Connery will make me smile no matter what. And, I like your grandma's "dusting and cleaning" comment. That is very true.

ahuva batya - my sense of humor sometimes is all that keeps me going. Thanks for your nice comments - and yes, the peeps are priceless!

thanks shinejil- you (along with everyone) will be with me tomorrow.

loribeth said...

I'll be there in thought as well. (((hugs))) I'm sorry. :(