tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2071619963519097832.post2343946963598793193..comments2023-04-03T05:55:29.571-07:00Comments on The Young and the Infertile: Realism and FatalismMrs.Xhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03810703338888705439noreply@blogger.comBlogger4125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2071619963519097832.post-28580206535278435652008-01-14T15:02:00.000-08:002008-01-14T15:02:00.000-08:00My husband is always saying that I am too negative...My husband is always saying that I am too negative and I expect to be disappointed, but I agree that realism is a different thing. I keep saying to him that I've already had two failed IVF's so you have to balance the very real possibility that it won't work again. If you go in expecting it's all going to magically work you are setting yourself up. It's a tough call because at the same time I do think that without any hope it's really an impossible journey. Let hope we all find the right balance!TABIhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17012958263294398438noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2071619963519097832.post-32364788393104899592008-01-14T09:40:00.000-08:002008-01-14T09:40:00.000-08:00Fatalism usually breeds passivity or is used as an...Fatalism usually breeds passivity or is used as an excuse for passivity, and you are actively working to change the situation you're unhappy with. So I vote for realism: reality is what it is, regardless of how much or little hope you feel. I like Kami's approach of living with the potential happiness if it doesn't make the possible disappointment worse. <BR/><BR/>I've personally sworn off hope for the time being, though oddly enough I'm not depressed. It just seems so silly to me at the moment, getting all hopeful about something completely out of my control. But ask me again in a couple weeks... :)<BR/><BR/>Thanks, Mrs. X, for the book recommendation you left. It sounds like a very interesting read.Shinejilhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03353174053245279899noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2071619963519097832.post-1624881189064575222008-01-14T07:03:00.000-08:002008-01-14T07:03:00.000-08:00Well, I can see why you got the Thinking Blogger a...Well, I can see why you got the Thinking Blogger award. You've already made me think this morning, something I'm usually able to avoid until at least after lunch.Lori Lavender Luzhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15394441222262940632noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2071619963519097832.post-69742995467615716542008-01-13T21:49:00.000-08:002008-01-13T21:49:00.000-08:00I don't think hope is such a bad thing. I have ha...I don't think hope is such a bad thing. I have had cycles with lots of hope and some with very little hope. While the shock of failure struck harder when I had more hope, after the initial hour or so the grieve and disappointment are the same. Why not have a few weeks enjoying the possibility? I can almost guarantee you that you won't feel any worse if things don't work out, but if they don't you will be glad of those days of glorious hope.<BR/><BR/>BTW, I am a pessimist at heart.Kamihttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01215000341567119958noreply@blogger.com